Monday, 14 April 2014

What's under the Leaf? - Version 1.

I've brought all the aspects of my animation together now and this is what I've got.

What's under the Leaf? - Version 1. from Ruby Newland on Vimeo.

Some lips still need to be added when the snails are eating and some of the cycle diagrams like a picture of the fiddlehead and also the sporangia sneezing, which will replace those pictures that are in the animation at the moment. I think I need to increase the volume of some of the sounds too like the sneezing and also at the end, turn up the background music so the audience know its ending.

Oh yeah and I've got to go through and check the spelling of my words. I've also re-rendered the first scene to make it flow more into the 2nd rather than jump but its left to render at uni so until then I've used an older render for it.

1 comment:

  1. Evening Rubes :)

    Well done on getting this up for feedback - I've just got few minor quibbles/suggestions:

    1) I don't like the slightly 'aimless' way that the illustrations and text sometimes float about as the camera adjusts - for example when the sporophyte and the gametophyte elements appear - they move about in what feels like a disorganised or non-commital way - as if you're not quite in control or the elements aren't quite fixed; anything you can do to tidy up these elements and their movements?

    2) When Roger arrives, I think you should just fade out the gametophyte illustration while that conversation takes place; again, it seems a bit distracting, having the diagram shrink, move and then move back again - just fade it out as the conversation begins.

    3) I don't like the way the 'fiddleheads as vegetables' diagram starts big and then shrinks to fit on the tree (this is again about the 'restlessness' of some of your elements, with them moving or shrinking etc. which you should avoid). - keep your drawings on the tree trunk area.

    4) I'd just reduce the sporangia illustration a bit so it fits more comfortably on the tree area.

    5) it's not clear that the sporangia are sneezing and so releasing the spores - the sneeze SFX needs to relate to action we also see on screen - just look again at the staging/timing of this section, because it's not quite readable yet.

    6) I think the 'sperm/egg' text and illustrations are all a bit too high, bumping against the top edge of the screen - can you bring them down a bit more towards the centre compositionally?

    7) I think you need somekind of 'comedy' sound effect for whenever Roger moves out of shot - particularly the 'hello mum!' bit - it feels like we should have a comedy whooshing or swannee whistle sound - at the moment the movement of the snails seems too silent - a noise for their travel and for their exits?

    8) I think you need to end your film pretty soon after the 'belch' (which needs to be bigger and funnier in terms of SFX) - your film sort of 'hangs on a bit' at the end...